


The Scientific Method

by writeringoodfaith



Series: Love Square Kisses [3]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrienette (Miraculous Ladybug), Drabble, F/M, Identity Reveal, Kissing, Ladynoir (Miraculous Ladybug), Prompt Fic, T rating for Nino's questionable taste in music, puns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:13:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24748918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writeringoodfaith/pseuds/writeringoodfaith
Summary: For an analytical girl with a question bugging her brain, there is only one way to test her hypothesis: the scientific method! Though the experiment may not lead to the discovery that she had wanted, unwittingly asking her favourite two blond-haired guys the exact same question might just lead to an even better revelation.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: Love Square Kisses [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1785649
Comments: 27
Kudos: 209





	The Scientific Method

**Author's Note:**

> I’m back with another “drabble”! One thing I have always excelled at in life has been exceeding the word count. It’s a problem. I can’t be stopped. Some background to this story is that the whole premise of it is based on a conversation I had with my husband when we were dating, who is, I think, the only person in the world that thinks that “I love you” SHOULD come first. (He’s ridiculous and I adore him.)
> 
> The kiss prompt (details in the series description): “Pulling away from a kiss, whispering words of love against each other’s lips.”

Marinette had a very important question. One essential for completely hypothetical purposes totally unrelated to the golden-haired boy who sat in front of her in class. One that had bugged her analytical mind to no end. What should come first in a budding relationship? Verbal affirmation, or physical affection? Or in layman's terms: "I love you"? Or a kiss?

Like any good scientist - of which chemistry was preferred over physics and biology was preferred over both - she knew she needed to conduct experiments to determine the answer. Posit a hypothesis. Experimentally validate it. Analyse the results. But boy. Oh boy. The results were inconclusive.

Because this wasn't a question she could just ask strangers on the street to get a proper random sample. In a perfect world, she'd have access to a representative subset of the population. But no, she didn't have that either. She was limited to the people whom she could pose this question without falling over in embarrassment.

Her first ~~victim~~ target was her best friend. Alya Cesaire. That conversation went a little like this.

"Girl, ya know it's all about the spark. And spark is just a euphemism for physical attraction! All the lovey-dovey stuff can come way later. Guys and their commitment issues and all. It's how it is." With a flick of her head, Alya's red hair swung over her shoulder. Alya was confident, curvy, and courageous. Marinette supposed Alya _would_ have no problems convincing any worthy suitor to lay one on her.

Alright.

Kiss: 1

I Love You: 0

When Marinette finally mustered the courage to ask Nino the same question (because she needed BOYS in her sample size damn it, what kind of scientist would she be if she only asked one gender?), his response should not have surprised her.

"Kissing is like," he paused to select a track on his phone and beckon her closer so she could listen to the music blaring out of his headphones. High notes punctured the air and then a female voice crooned out, "Oh lover, don't you dare slow down." Marinette's eyebrows reached her hairline but Nino didn't notice because his own eyes were shut as he was jamming. She continued listening. "Go longer, you can last more rounds."

"NINO!" she screeched.

"What?" He took the headphones off.

Her cheeks were bright red. "Okay. That's a kissing vote for you. Thanks for participating in the experiment."

Kiss: 2

I Love You: 0

She turned to her parents next. She needed a range of ages to make the experiment less biased.

Maman was all: "Oh darling, the first time your Papa kissed me, I thought the butterflies in my stomach would kill me! It was so _thrilling_."

Marinette smiled.

Her Papa then added, "You thought _you_ would die? I was pretty sure my heart was going into cardiac arrest - it was beating so fast."

Okay. So both her parents almost died, but the answer for both of them was still the kiss. But she wanted to make sure. "But why kissing _before_ I love you? Doesn't it make sense to set some boundaries first, establish some expectations before running into the trap of getting physical too quickly, and being subject to hormonal urges?"

Both of her parents shrugged. Her Maman replied first. "That's what love is, Marinette. It's taking a risk. Sometimes body language is easier to communicate with than words."

Her Papa nodded in response. "There are many opportunities for "I love you" afterward. But the kiss is the start." With a bear hug, he then tackled her Maman, hefting her up into the air in a bear hug, her legs lifting clear above the counter as he swung her around. Her Maman was giggling as her Papa pressed dozens of kisses onto her face, interspersed by I love you's. Marinette decided now would be a good time to leave.

She went upstairs, shutting the door that led upstairs behind her.

Kiss: 4

I Love You: 0

"Tikki," she addressed her red friend. "Why am I the only one conflicted about this?"

"I don't know Marinette," the wisdom of a thousand generations embodied in a flying bug-mouse creature replied. "What gave you the idea that "I love you" should be said before any kisses are exchanged?"

"Well…" her mind drifted to Chat.

The way he said I love you to Ladybug on the regular. Always so casual.

"I'm gonna have to love you and leave you," he'd say as he left after an akuma battle.

"What's up, my lady love?" he'd ask her when he bumped into her during joint patrol.

"Don't you dare lay a finger on the love of my life!" he'd snarl at a charging akuma victim, throwing his own body, or baton, or whatever he could in between danger and his lady.

She glanced down at Tikki. "How about a little field research to add to my science experiment?" her suggestion was served with a grin.

Tikki responded with enthusiasm. "Anything for love!" she twirled around in a mid-air pirouette before settling onto Marinette's shoulder. "Ready."

"Tikki, spots on!" she called out.

It shouldn't be so surprising that Chat Noir was out and about earlier than his patrol time. She was Lady Luck after all.

Her conversation with Chat was illuminating.

"Of course "I love you" comes first. You have to declare your intentions before swooping in and invading someone's personal space."

She couldn't hide a snort. "Sounds like Kitty knows from experience?"

"Experience is the wisest and most beautiful teacher," he quipped back with the audacity to wink at her. But even worse, her cheeks had the audacity to blush.

"We-Well," she began, "Thanks for parkissipating - I MEAN," her eyes widened at the slip. "Tha-Thank you for participating. In my experiment science! For SCIENCE!"

"I make science puns all the time but only great ones _periodically_ ," he sang out.

She knew this was the time that she should groan, or maybe flick his bell and show him what real wordplay sounded like but her face was burning with the fire of a thousand suns and she had no response.

Something completely unintelligible like "meep!" escaped her.

"Huh." He shot her a levelled look.

And so she fled from the scene of the crime. The crime being talking to Chat Noir about kissing and blushing at the same time. She couldn't do that to him! It'd be so unfair. Not when she knew how she felt. And he, well, he kind of knew she was into someone else.

But armed with at least one person who favoured her point of view, she felt ready. Nino, Alya, Maman and Papa were all wrong. It would be best to start out with I love you before leaning into the kissing. Maybe if she were lucky, she could get both! But for now, she had to see.

* * *

The next day, she approached the last unknowing participant in her science experiment.

He had fencing after school today, so it was the perfect opportunity to get over her stutter, slip slyly by and gain confirmation that she was doing the right thing.

When he slammed his locker door shut, with a start he realised she was there. He pressed a perfect hand to his chest.

"I'm so sorry, Marinette! You scared me." He chuckled weakly. He removed the fencing helmet he had put on to talk to her properly.

She surreptitiously rubbed the drool forming at the corner of her mouth.

"No worries," she said but it came out about two octaves higher than her normal speaking register. Cringing, she tried again. "No worrlies." Close enough. She went over the lines as rehearsed with Tikki the night before. "I was wondering whether I could ask you a question." First sentence out. This was great! Not a stutter to be seen! Eighty-eight times was indeed the magic number for practising. "It's about whether"— and then it came out really fast but he was staring at her, and she was TALKING to him and could you really blame a girl?— "kissing-or-saying-Iloveyou-should-be-done-first-because-Ithink-saying-Iloveyou-should-befirstbut-nobody-agrees-withme!"

She turned away to suck in a deep breath. Getting it out really fast was back-up plan 5 for her delivery. Good thing she had practised that too. She went on in a more measured tone.

"You see, I am conducting a science experiment. For personal reasons."

Adrien swept his hair from his eyes as he listened to her and her heart rudely skipped a beat.

"I love science," he grinned with enthusiasm. "They bring out the best jokes in me. Periodically."

What?

Why did that sound so familiar?

She shook her head and soldiered on. "So I just need help with my experiment."

At this, his head tilted to the side and she watched the bangs he had just swept into place move along with him. "Well, _experience_ does make the most beautiful teacher."

Then he winked at her.

He had the audacity to wink at her.

Wait…

Wait just a minute!

Her mouth fell open as she stared at the boy in front of her. Said boy was shuffling his feet and had raised an awkward hand to the back of his head.

"I was wondering when you'd cotton on, LB."

Her mouth shut close with an audible click of her jaws.

"You can't go around asking super specific questions and just not expect - mmph!"

Adrien did not get to finish talking about what she could not expect because Marinette see, had employed step 15 of back up plan 10 of her rehearsals with Tikki. And Marinette had yelled out "I LOVE YOU!" before tippy-toeing up to reach him. And kiss him.

On the lips.

After an earth-shattering moment, she pulled away, but only long enough to whisper. "I really do love you, Kitty."

"My Princess, I love you too."

Adrien was a _little_ late to fencing practice that day. But that was understandable. It was for science, right?

Kiss: 4

I Love You: 2

It was him and her against the world.

And she wouldn't have it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: No science was harmed (or used, really) in the making of this drabble. 
> 
> Also, gotta give a shout out to my pal Captain_Meowvel who has made stuttering and word-switching Marinette an Absolute Art Form (see You Times Two chapters 1 & 2 in particular). If by any chance I succeeded, it was only because I channelled her.


End file.
